One time this guy decided to ignore everything that he wanted, and to only think of this one girl. From that moment on, everything he did and said and even thought was in her best interest - or at least what he perceived to be in her best interest. He didn't matter at all, even to himself. She was the only one that mattered.

Then, several years later, the guy died alone and unloved.

The moral of this story is that there is no moral.

I know I always say this, but I wasn't even planning to go to Rich O's last night. I always say it, but then I follow-up by saying that I went to Rich O's.

I went to Rich O's at a little after 6:00, because MusicalYuppieDude had texted me that NormalGirl might be there. So I rushed out to my truck, drove about halfway there, then came back home and put on clothes, then drove all the way to Rich O's.

When I arrived, MusicalYuppieDude told me that I'd missed "her" by five minutes. Whoever it was. Might not have been NormalGirl at all - all MusicalYuppieDude had to go by was a grainy picture I'd sneaked with my phone's camera the night I'd met her.

I texted NormalGirl and asked if she'd been at Rich O's. No response, but that could mean a lot of things. First thing on my mind, of course, being that I've somehow blown it with her and will never see or hear from her again, perhaps that a restraining order is in the works even as I type this sentence. That's the fun way that my mind works.

Anyway, the place was pretty full of weirdoes, but luckily the kiddie table was available, so I sat there. I had, of course, an NABC Cone Smoker (2246) and I, of course, glared at the weirdoes.

I noticed ArtGirl sitting over at the stand-up bar - she'd drug a chair there. So I went and talked to her for a bit, and invited her to join me at the kiddie table. She politely declined and continued to write in her notebook. Probably a restraining order.

OddlyFamiliarGirl came in and sat with me, and I spent most of the rest of the night talking with her about various stuff. It was all nice and pleasant, even though some of the topics covered were anything but nice or pleasant. Also, LaptopGirl has been looking for OddlyFamiliarGirl, so I emailed the former about the latter's presence. No response, and another possible restraining order.

At about the time I got my second Cone Smoker (2266), my friends Eric and Teri came in. Surprise! I was very glad to see them. Last time had been for my nephew's funeral in August. So I talked with them until they left to go do something or other.

I rejoined OddlyFamiliarGirl at the kiddie table and talked to her some more while I had a third Cone Smoker (2286). I see that Cone Smoker has moved into second place on my all-time beer consumption list. It passed Weihenstephaner Hefeweissbier by 7 ounces, and it trails Newcastle by only 5,875 ounces. Not that anything will ever catch Newcastle. Availability + Yumminess = Supremacy.

OddlyFamiliarGirl moved up to the bar to talk to Roger, and I ended the evening just as I'd begun it - alone at the kiddie table. Also, I'd got a text message from HatGirl, but then something happened to my phone and a lot of my messages were lost. This put me in a bad mood, so I came home.

One time these people went camping. It was pleasant, if a little boring. But then a bee flew down the front of this one hot girl's shirt, and she quickly tore her shirt off, revealing perfect breasts.

The moral of this story is that it would be a shame if all the bees disappeared.

Last night, Rich O's was fairly full, but it seemed empty for a couple of reasons. Reason the first was that there were several actual parking spots available in the actual parking lot. Reason the second was that just about all of the people there were either PBDs or at least regulars. So no idiots or weirdoes. So that was cool.

One of the PBDs had the throne, so I sat at the kiddie table with my first yummy Cone Smoker (2206) of the night. I exchanged a few pleasantries with some of the people in the living room, but for the most part I just vegged out.

Oh yeah, TremensGirl was there. She'd said a while ago that she wouldn't be back until at least December. I'd said that she'd cave before November was over. So I'd win that bet, if we'd actually bet anything.

Nothing happened for a long time. I emailed LaptopGirl that her BFF was there. I resisted the urge to text NotHideousGirl or NormalGirl. I talked to the regulars and the PBDs. At one point GrammarLady "lost" her purse and there was an impromptu Keystone Kops skit as everyone searched for it. It was found, eventually, in her car. Duh.

Then FirstLady gave me the throne. That was nice of her. TremensGirl said something about the universe being right again.

I had a second Cone Smoker (2226) at one point, then I got annoyed by one of the regulars, so I cut myself off lest I say the wrong thing. Again.

This one PBD wanted to buy me a beer, but I had to decline. Three Cone Smokers would have been too much for me last night. The offer was certainly appreciated, though.

Anyway, I ended up coming home at 11:30 or so. Kind of a pleasant night, but also kind of a waste.

I stole this from a thread at fark.com. I want this on a t-shirt:

I was talking to this girl tonight, about various topics ranging from my ass to how good I smelled, and eventually she asked me what it was that I wanted. As in, what did I want in a relationship?

I became a little tongue-tied. Which was strange because I've certainly thought about this subject a lot. Probably more than is healthy.

But, despite all of my thinking, I couldn't really come up with a definitive answer. All I could think of were examples from several diferent relationships. An amalgam of sorts.

---

Driving late at night, with her and the kids else asleep in the car. She counted on me to get us to our destination safely. She trusted me.

---

We'd watch a movie, and she'd lie on the couch with her head in my lap. She'd invariably fall asleep, and I'd be unable to move for hours. I could never bring myself to wake her, she was so pretty and peaceful.

---

She'd be feeling sad, and she'd lean her head against my shoulder and sigh.

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She'd come into the bar and look around for anyone she knew, and she'd see me and she'd smile.

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She came to me crying, and she hugged me, and she kissed me, and we made love. We didn't say a word to each other for hours, because we didn't need to.

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She'd call me or text me whenever she wanted someone to talk to. I was always there for her.

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That way she'd blush every single time I gave her even the slightest compliment.

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Sparkles.

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I talked to her, and it was like we were the only people on Earth. I had her complete attention, just as she had mine.

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She was tired. I didn't even know her. But she slept leaning against me on the plane.

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We talked for what seemed like hours, and our faces were so close that our lips were almost touching. Eventually, our lips did touch.

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I grabbed her hand, finally, and she squeezed my hand soooo hard.

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I'd look at her in a certain way, and her nipples would harden.

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She could never simply touch me. There always had to be something more. Little circles she'd make with her fingers - they'd drive me insane.

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She simply understood me.

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She forgave me.

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She loved me.

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I'd watch her sleep, and all of the stress in my life would wash away like it was never even there.

---

That's what I want. More stuff like that, please.

One night this guy and this girl were at a bar. When the girl left, she forgot her notebook. So the guy went running outside after her, calling her name.

When the girl heard the guy behind her calling her name, she stopped and turned around slowly. She seemed surprised to see that the guy still had his pants on.

The moral of this story is that sometimes you should take your pants off, if only because it's expected of you.

One day these two boys were playing around in an old shed. Then the sister of one of the boys came and locked them in the shed!

After about an hour, she finally let them out. When the boys went to tell on her, they found out that she'd told her dad that the boys had been using bad words. This was not fucking true, but the dad believed the girl and not the boys. So the boys got into trouble for cursing, and the girl probably got ice cream or something.

The moral of this story is that sometimes it's better to be a little girl than a little boy.

...there was this stupid dog named Fido. Really original name, I know.

Fido liked to eat dead animals.

But, besides being stupid, Fido was also lazy as fuck, so he never bothered to actually hunt and kill anything. Nope, he'd just look for something that was already dead. Like road-kill and other gross stuff.

Then he'd bring the rotted carcass up onto the porch and gnaw on it for a while, until this kid named Dave took it from him and threw it in the trash barrel.

The moral of this story is that random dead things are disgusting.

Took too long of a nap tonight. Might have slept all night except my phone Woo Hooed at me at about 11:30.

A message from LaptopGirl!

Woo Hoo!

Anyway, this morning I was in a bit of a pickle. As far as I knew, I had about 83 cents to my name, and I was nearly out of gas. So I had the brilliant idea to actually check my bank balance instead of just assuming that I was broke.

Almost $94 in there, on the day before payday. I've been eating dirt for the past week for nothing, it seems.

So I was able to gas up my truck and make it to work. Later, with my newfound wealth, I was able to go and observe AlliDay at The Pub. BikerGirl got her hair cut off and dyed slightly red. She looks hot. I told her that it was like I'd discovered that she had a hot twin sister.

I ended up having a pint and a half of Newcastle (8139), and a dude from work paid for it.

Then, after work, I went to Rich O's and had a Cone Smoker (2128). While I was there, Bubbles came in, and she'd messed with her hair as well. Went from blonde to completely black. A huge difference.

I was talking with NotHideousGirl's ex-husband, and this one chick I never saw before. The subject of hitting a deer on the road came up, and I mentioned that I'd met MixedSignalGirl when she'd hit a deer while driving in front of me. The chick I never saw before said that she'd hit a deer once, too. Turns out that the chick and MixedSignalGirl have the same name.

Weird.

Now, after my nap that ran on for way too long, I'm wide awake at 1:00 AM. I'm having a glass of Cone Smoker (2146) in lieu of anything with caffeine, so I hope I'll be able to grab some sleep in a couple of hours.

Well, I guess I'm not going to do the novel thing this year.

There are several reasons. I wrote most of them in an email the other day, in part saying...

I think that, the more I thought about it, the more I realized that the nanowrimo thing just wasn't for me. Not this year at least. I don't want to do anything half-assed, and that's pretty much what they tell you to do, with that whole Quantity Over Quality thing. It just rubs me the wrong way. Plus, there are some weirdoes in the group.

I just don't have the time. Not this month. I've got this Las Vegas trip staring me in the face, and all I can think about is that I'd have to write my entire 50,000-word novel by the 24th instead of by the 30th.

I still really like parts of the idea though. So I might just try to write myself a 50,000-word novel. It won't be done in a month, though. More like several months or even a year.

It seems like it might be fun, as long as a deadline isn't constantly bearing down on me.