The high point of my day yesterday was replacing the broken ice maker in my refrigerator.

Then I really pushed the envelope by replacing the water filter on the same refrigerator.

I am a wild man.

Well, the hot blondes didn't win The Amazing Race, despite my fervent rooting.

This certainly puts a damper on my plan, which consisted of:

1. Hot blondes win The Amazing Race.


2. Hot blondes use their winnings to purchase me as their sex slave.

1. Stephanie wins Survivor.


2. Stephanie uses her winnings to purchase me as her sex slave.

I found myself walking down a dirt road, one so overgrown with weeds that you could hardly tell it was ever a road at all. Only the deep ruts running into the distance betrayed its existence as anything but just another field.

Ahead of me, the road stretched to a horizon hidden in fog. I turned my head to look behind me and saw the same visage. I was on a road between two nowheres.

How did I end up here?

Where did I come from?

Where was I going?

I kept walking. There was nothing else to do.

Eventually, I came upon a fence that slanted in from the right and then turned to parallel the road. Just a picket fence, once gleaming white perhaps but now the faded gray of neglect, the fence accompanied me on my journey. The fence became my companion as I walked the road. Its gaps and its raggedness and its general state of disrepair, these all gave it character, gave it a personality that resonated within me somehow.

I knew that the fence meant something. The fence was important.

I continued to walk, and I continued to wonder.

(to be, um, continued)

Took a long nap after work tonight, from 6:30 until 11:30. I'd planned to sleep for a full eight hours but my cats would have none of that nonsense. They decided to hold an impromptu game of seek and destroy the sheet monster.

The sheet monster of course being by feet, my knees, hands, my groin, or whatever unfortunate part of me happened to be making a lump in the sheet at any particular moment.

My lightest cat, Buddy, weighs seventeen pounds. Happy weighs twenty pounds. Nugget is made of some material so dense that he carries his own gravitational field around with him, and any attempt to weigh him is therefore useless.

So now it's almost 1:00. I've watched the rest of the Survivor reunion show and I'm drinking a yummy Rogue Imperial Stout (62) in an attempt to fuel my creative fires.

I don't think I have any creative fires left to fuel. I've been feeling completely wrung out for the past couple of days. Even when I try to stir the passions within me, I get nothing. I spent a good (just right, not obsessive at all) amount of time yesterday staring at a picture that, at one time, would never fail to inspire me to write something halfway decent.

But yesterday all it inspired me to do was feel like an idiot for wasting a year of my life.

I was talking with CoffeeDude the other night about my 'blog. He'd asked if I was still writing in it. I said of course, but it's become really boring lately. The things that I used to write about are no longer relevant, and all that's left are pretty bland topics. Then, when something interesting does happen, this fucking discretion thing kicks in and so I don't give the subject all of the attention it deserves.

But I suppose, like all other slumps, this too shall pass. Eventually.

(response to message)

Oh yeah? Prove it. What's her name?

I'm totally bored and emotionally wrung-out today. I tried to write a stupid entry but my UPS is broken and it kept shutting my computer off. Rather than attempt for a fourth time to write my stupid entry, I'll post this entry fragment that I found on my computer desktop today. This was to have been the end of another entry. For some reason I didn't post this part before.

But wait, there's more!

People in the know tell me that it's understandable that I'm stressed right now. Many of these people are the same ones that have been telling me for months that I wasn't making any sense. Now all of a sudden it's okay? Now all of a sudden you understand? This pisses me off. Don't pretend to understand when you clearly don't. Don't try to make me feel better when your only incentive is to feel more comfortable around me. If you don't feel comfortable around me, then kindly stay the fuck away.

I am not your doll that you can dress up and pose and show off to your friends.

After Friday's crowding, Saturday night was just what I needed.

I got to the bar a little after 9:00, and stood at the bar and talked with SpikeBoy for a few minutes. He's still seeing the same girl, so I may have to come up with a nickname for her. We'll see.

The rest of the night I spent over in the living room area talking with the likes of CoffeeDude, DooRagGirl, and GreenBeerDude and his friends. Everything was nice and quiet and relaxing.

To drink, I had a Bell's Kalamazoo Stout (95), then one of those Strubbe things that I'd had on Friday (20), and finally a yummy Alaskan Smoked Porter (222), which had managed to sneak back onto the shelves without my noticing.

We had some interesting conversations that I may end up writing some entries about, so I'm going to cut this entry short.

On the way home, I saw that VigilanteGirl was still working, so I stopped and saw her. When she found out that I'd gotten home Friday she was a little pissed. She threw candy bars at me and completely denied seeing me, and ignoring me, when I'd stopped to see her first thing Friday. Women are strange.

I've been tagged by allaboutme to do this five weird things about me exercise. I'm supposed to list the five things and then tag five other people to do the same thing.

I actually did some entries a year ago about my quirks, flaws, and assets. In the quirks entry I listed eleven things. I'll now try to come up with five new ones.

1. I have this rock. I talk to my rock and take it everywhere. In a few days I have to send the rock back to where it came from, and I'm thinking about throwing a going-away party for the rock. Did I mention that it's a rock?

2. I'll make up new, cat-themed lyrics to songs and sing them to my cats. I make Buddy dance with me while I do this.

3. I've developed the habit of smelling my beer before each sip, to enhance the tasting experience, and now that habit has spread to everything I drink. Doesn't matter if it's water or Diet Vanilla Coke or orange juice or whatever - I'm smelling it before each sip.

4. I brush my teeth, then rinse with this supposedly "cool mint" mouthwash that burns my mouth so much that I brush my teeth again right away to neutralize the mouthwash.

5. When I'm on the phone at home I can't just sit and talk. I have to either walk around or shoot pool or straighten things up - anything but just sit and talk.

I'm not going to tag anybody. I think everyone else on Earth has already done this anyway.